Snake tales.

Sleeping while wearing a surgical mask to block the smell while bussing through Cambodia (thanks Ron).

Celebrating Ron's arrival with new tattoos and a couple of brews, sitting on stools on Khaosan Road, Bangkok.

Trying on pants in Chattuchuk market, Bangkok. The stores are so small they give you a large dress-like garment to change under (sorta the Bangkok version of the towel change). 2 thumbs way up.

Ringside photograph of Muay Thai kickboxing at Lumphini Stadium, Bangkok.

Serious wat-tage. In front of the Grand Palace, Bangkok.

My best meal in Thailand, eaten in a food court in the mall. Not sure what it was, just pointed to something and they started filling my bowl with deliciousness, including a ladelful from a vat of boiling beef fat.

On the train back from Ayuthaya, north of Bangkok, with some American girls I biked around the temples with.

Angkor What? is the name of a bar in Siem Reap where we drank. Angkor Wat is the temple (pictured above), Cambodia.

Some Cambodian boys singing for money near Angkor Wat, Cambodia.

Hanging on to some roots at a temple near Angkor Wat. Part of Lara Croft: Tombraider was filmed here, and it still smelled like Angelina Jolie.

Perched atop a temple near Angkor Wat, Cambodia.

More wattage.

Ron sipping a manly Raspberry-Lime daquiri in Friends restaurant, Phnom Penh, Cambodia.

Ron getting a proper foot washing, pre-massage in Phnom Penh, Cambodia.

Deliciousness (clockwise from top-left): Khmer grilled pork sandwich with papaya salad; tropical mixed fruit freeze; potato fish cakes with red pepper sauce; garlic and honey meatballs; Fish Laksa.

Thumbs up from the hospital bed, Siem Reap, Cambodia. Luckily all is well now.

First (and last) bite of snake, Siem Reap, Cambodia. The facial expression says it all.

Ron arrives. Adam rejoices and shaves (he likes my skin soft like baby's arse). Mayhem ensues.

Let me back up. We marked Ron's arrival by taking in Bangkok's sights in one deep breath: Grand Palace, Wat Pho (reclining Buddha), Lumphini Muay Thai kickboxing fights, Chattuchuk weekend market, Khaosan Road, and of course Thai massages and drinking on stools in the street.

Funny thing about Ron, sometimes his heart's too big for his own good. Much of Southeast Asian tourism requires navigating through a sea of pleading children asking for money and selling useless trinkets. To my endless amusement, Ron just melts at the sight of these kids. We'll be walking somewhere and I'll turn around to see him surrounded by a crowd of 5 or 6 little ones, Ron's distraught face expressing his understanding that he doesn't want to buy a dozen Angkor Wat refrigerator magnets but can't leave these guys hanging. Eventually he caves. He always does. Even when he bought basically the same items from the last group of kids. But that's Ron. You gotta love the guy. So that's how we ended up drinking in the streets on stools wearing bejewelled hats, donning tribal tattoos, stuffing trinkets in our bags (well, Ron's bag), and thumb wrestling 8-year old girls and losing, BADLY -- seriously, this girl had mad thumb wrestling skills, though I'm sure the drinking didn't help us.

From Bangkok we bussed and taxied our way into Siem Reap, Cambodia, which is near Angkor Wat. We arrived without getting scammed, apparently a miracle according to the guidebook. Cambodia is an interesting and smelly place, with of course some tasty treats to please the palette. Amok Fish soup was exponentially yummy. Our second night in Cambodia we decided to go for some Cambodian BBQ, which included not 1 but 2 reptiles: crocodile and snake. I usually keep my reptile consumption to 1 per meal but made an exception, for vacation's sake. The crocodile was surprisingly good, and I'd eat it again. The snake was unsurprisingly snakey: rubbery and tough, and I swear it started to coil around my tongue...

A night of drinking and 16 hours later Ron was instructing me how to perform CPR on him in case he lost consciousness. We were in a tuk tuk frantically rushing him to the hospital after a bad bacteria-related scare. Thankfully Ron is partially alive. No, he's totally fine now. Phew. Lesson learned: 1 reptile/meal.

We got to see Angkor Wat, which was quite splendid, as well as a bunch of other really cool temples with the giant roots of trees growing all over them. Now we're in Phnom Penh, getting 4-hand massages (2 girls, 1 person), seeing the torture museum and killing fields (horrific and depressing -- 2 million ppl hacked to death -- but important to see), and eating multiple times at Friends restaurant (thanks Mike Spiegler for the rec), run by a program that takes kids off the streets and teaches them to cook and work in the hospitality industry. Today we visited ChildSafe where we learned not to give money to children on the street (here's why: http://www.childsafe-international.org/TFResidents.asp) and made donations to help get them off the street. Tomorrow we get on a boat down the Mekong to Vietnam.

No more snakes.

Bad boy in Bangkok

On a boat taxi in Bangkok with a German girl.

I made this cafe clerk take a picture with me because his name is Oil (look closely on his nametag). Just complete awesomeness.

Doing the pee-pee dance in front of a bathroom with a pee-pee dance bathroom sign in MBK mall, Bangkok.

In Maya Bay ("The Beach"), near Phi Phi island, Thailand.

Same as above. Breathtaking. And the beach is nice, too.

Dancing the crazy with an Irish and British friend on Phi Phi Island.

A picture with the sweet-as-pie proprietor of my beach bungalow. She is wearing my thrift store glasses which I gave to her as a parting present.

In front of a Temple in Bangkok. Even though it looks like it, I am not actually holding my nuts (see pee-pee dance pic above for that).

Alright, a few words about my time since Phi Phi Island. Phi Phi is incredibly touristy and party-oriented, so I didn't think I'd like it upon revival. However, I met a lot of really friendly people who I partied with and found myself having a lot of fun. I took another snorkeling trip to the surrounding areas, and saw more gorgeous beaches. At night I drank copious amounts of beer and was forced to drink from "buckets" -- literally buckets filled with red bull, alcohol, and soda with straws -- making me drunk and crazy. Then I danced around on tables with a big group of British guys screaming the words to crappy mid-90s hits the likes of the Counting Crows and Rage Against the Machine. All in all it was a hilariously good time.

Next I pushed over to Ko Tao, an island near Ko Samui specializing in good diving. I didn't dive, but snorkeled one day, which was pretty spectacular. Saw a huge school of barracudas dart past, luckily they didn't go for the nads. I hung out with some Swiss guys most of the time. We just lazed around on a beachfront bar/restaurant drinking fruit shakes and dipping when we felt like it. My last night there we went out pretty hard, until around 6 am. I passed out while brushing my teeth, waking up a few minutes before my boat left to the sound of the bathroom faucet running and dried toothpaste all over myself. I will be running for political office shortly.

Now I'm in Bangkok helping with the Revolution. It's not too clear exactly what's going on here, but here's what I know: there have been protests, the government declared a state of emergency, one person has been killed and 40 injured, schools are cancelled for a few days, and the food in Bangkok is incredibly tasty. That sounds a lot worse than it actually is here. Bangkokers (Bangkokians? Bangkokites? Cocks?) are going about their business as usual, things are running, the protests are really only in one area and are not violent for the most part. I feel totally safe, so don't worry. I'm staying near Khoasan road, which is a cross between a drunken backpacker orgy and Tijuana. Being hounded here is a right of passage. A Tuk-tuk driver called me "Bad Boy" and then told me to "Fuck off" because I didn't want to take his tuk-tuk. But most people are nice. I took a river bus with the locals, ate amazing and cheap street food, and bought a nice pair of Diesel knock-off jeans. Bangkok is nuts, but its the kind of nuts I like. "Beautiful chaos" as someone described it.

My friend Ron arrives Saturday, when the real fun starts. More soon.

Adam

Figs, moving sweat dens, and endless paradise.

Standing on the front of a longtail boat, hairy pits and all, Thailand.

On the boat to Phi Phi island, Thailand.

West Railay Beach near Krabi, Thailand.

With friends after a day's snorkeling trip near Krabi, Thailand.

Fried egg ice cream, Melaka, Malaysia.

Time got away from me and now I have so much to catch up on.

My last few hours in Japan I had my best meal there. No, not the super-fresh sushi I had at 8 am at Tjukiji Fish Market, which was awesome. A few hours before my flight I wandered into a supermarket and bought a package of fresh figs, sat on the ground outside and bit into the juiciest, most flavor-packed figs I've tasted, with a hint of cinnamon aftertaste. After I was done I just sat there shaking my head in disbelief. Figs? Yes, figs.

Flew to Singapore, which I did in a day. Funny, based on all the lore I'd expected the streets to sparkle and the people to walk around like robots. But Japan was actually much cleaner and orderly. Singapore was still nice. The three ethnic groups -- Indian, Malay, and Chinese -- produce some wicked-ass food. I felt I could have stayed in Singapore a week just to eat, but since I felt there was only a day's worth of exploring to do I fit a week's worth of eating in a single day. This included Chicken Murtabak at 2 am, Singaporean kaya toast (jam w/ eggs), fish head curry, and some amazing Chinese desserts (see my last post for pictures and descriptions).

After Singapore I blew threw Malaysia. I'd planned to spend a few days making my way up the coast, but just didn't really like it there. Ma-lame-sia. I didn't give it much of a chance, and maybe I was too tired and pissed off from taking the "Super V.I.P." mini-bus, aka sweat lodge on wheels, and all the yelling at the bus stations. The bus station at Kuala Lumpur was enough to make me want to deep fry my own turds and eat them. But the food was awesome. I spent a few hours in a colonial town called Melaka, where I ate something called Fried Egg ice cream, and a day wandering around Penang, another colonial city with a fairly relaxing feel to it.

A day's worth of frustrating travel later, I found myself near Krabi, Thailand at some insanely beautiful and relaxing beaches. Tremendous limestone cliffs flank the secluded beaches, making for quite dramatic scenery. I stayed on a climber's beach called Ton Sai, where most accomodations run around $5, the Thais working and living there have long hair and seem happy as can be, and the massages run free and cheap. The food wasn't particularly good, probably because the beach is so secluded (you can only get there by longtail boat), but the atmosphere was intoxicating. After spending 10 days or so running around like mad it's been nice just sitting on a gorgeous beach with nothing to do but dip and tan.

Yesterday I went on a snorkeling trip by longtail boat, saw some beautiful fish, ate delicious seafood green curry at sunset on a tiny sand strip with water on both sides with a beer to wash down the paradise. On the way back it was dark and the boat stopped at one point to let us swim among the glowing plankton. I've never seen the movie "The Beach," but apparently they do this in the movie. Basically, when you move in the water you see tons of tiny glowing lights, so it looks like you're lit-up when you swim around. It was beautiful.

I had a difficult time leaving Ton Sai because I could spend a long, long time there just relaxing, but I felt the need to see a few of the other beaches. So now I'm on Phi Phi island where the movie "The Beach" was filmed. It's incredibly touristy here, but still beautiful. I hope to go on a boat tour tomorrow to see some of the surrounding bays, etc.